I can say whatever I want!
hooray

The cavities of my face don’t fill with helium laughter,
my lungs don’t exhaust the wild cards that burn me.
Rows of people yell hip hip hooray (x2) and say 
let’s write down all that she has to say.

Oh disenfranchised, open your mouths! 
We won’t judge anything that comes flying out
In the world of half brand new, it looks good on us if it looks good on you.

I could have opened my mouth this whole time.

It looks good to them, this repertoire of hidden things in my armoire. Still they’ll call it cheating, they’ll call it puppy-guarding, they’ll call it as they seem it—

I can say whatever I want! who stopped stirring my scalding pot—Fuck what do you do when suddenly
You’re told and decide that you can say whatever you want?

Well.

I want to have secrets that open nothing
Be a human experiment, swing from action
to feeling, plan transcontinental flights
and show up to all the wrong meetings,
and what I’m saying is that I’m not
there, I’m holding all of them here,
I choke on nothing, the clean vantage point of the cloud mocks me and in the absence of traction,
I’m a fool.

I’m sorry I didn’t hear the newborn’s bloodcurdling scream earlier,
I am not anymore in the room that I’m in.